Teacher Feedback

Teacher Feedback:
WWW:

• There is a good essay here somewhere but currently lacking in several key areas.

EBI:

• Written English very poor from the first sentence.
• Paragraphs desperately need strong topic sentences to show organisation + direction of argument.
• Textual analysis lacking in detail and media language - give me specific timings for the scene.
• Paragraph 2 (textual analysis) also needs quotes and research to build on point re: romanticising violence (which is a great point).
• Research/quotes in general very poor: 13 footnotes is 20-25 quotes short if you want an A grade.
• Need much more on new/digital impact on certification. Could get loads of quotes in too.
• Conclusion weak ( and titled CONC - did you even proofread this?)

Aspirational Grade: A*

List of things I will change:

1. For my second draft I will add more quotes (approximately 20-25) into my critical investigation and to my bibliography.
2. I will improve my grammar and sentences in order for them to flow and link together.

Teacher Feedback

The Godfather Trailer:

• Incredibly ambitious recreation - very tough.
• Agree with criticisms: Setting, Lighting, Sound, all weaknesses.
• Costume, Framing, and editing reasonably solid.
• Lacking professional finish - significantly so.
• Lessons to be learned across the board.

Grade = 16 = D

Preliminary Recreation Questions

1. Why did you choose this particular recreation and how does it link to your main production?
   We chose this particular recreation as we are planning to make a trailer for our final production and the Godfather had linked to my topic as it questions censorship in terms of its violence and language.
    
2. What difficulties did you face in producing this recreation?
   The difficulties we had faced were that we only had a limited amount of time to shoot the trailer and edit the trailer, and we could only shoot at night time therefore the lighting was a difficulty and the editing required much more precision than other forms of production due to it being an intense classic trailer.
    
3. What are the strengths of the production?
   The strengths are the sound and editing and the use of costumes and props as we had virtually no time to prepare.
    
4. What aspects would you look to improve?
   I would like to improve the settings and perhaps add an effect like a sepia effect to provide the trailer with that authentic classic look.
    
5. What lessons will you take from this process that will help you with your main production?
   I would take that it isn't entirely difficult, but when creating a trailer, attention to detail is vital.

The Godfather Recreation

Preliminary Task Plan

Name of the text you plan to recreate:
The Godfather Trailer

Scene/section you will recreate:
Opening 30 seconds

Location you will use for your recreation:
House and school

Actors you will require for your recreation:
2 Male Actors

Props/costumes you will require for your recreation:
A gun, and 2 suits

Equipment you plan to use:
A Camera, Tripod, Microphone, LED torch